Comments on: Newsflash: I’m a bad mom but so are you… kinda

By: Katelyn Fagan

Katelyn Fagan — Tue, 09 Oct 2018 05:17:23 +0000

In reply to Lyndell. Awe! You are SO welcome!

By: Lyndell

Lyndell — Mon, 08 Oct 2018 22:34:55 +0000

Just what I needed to read! As I am my own worst enemy thinking I’m a bad mum, but I know I’m not really, just an imperfect person. Perfectly written tho, thankyou. ?

By: JEAN GAERTE

JEAN GAERTE — Thu, 20 Sep 2018 16:51:07 +0000

WELL SAID. IF THIS IS ANY COMFORT I HEARD AND DONE TO
ME FACE TO FACE. THIS PERSON WAS VERY MEAN WITH HER WORDS. THIS WAS DONE IN THE 1980’s

By: Jaimi@TheStay-at-Home-MomSurvivalGuide

Jaimi@TheStay-at-Home-MomSurvivalGuide — Wed, 25 Feb 2015 03:30:07 +0000

In reply to Katelyn Fagan. I agree with you! That is awful that you would be attacked (via "faceless" social media, no less). We all can use more grace and we can all offer much more-I know I need to! I think (many) bloggers in general do start from a place of love and service, and often we are looked at in a more hateful light. I appreciate your posts and all that you share. I know you start from a place of wanting to help others be productive. You rock!

By: Katelyn Fagan

Katelyn Fagan — Mon, 23 Feb 2015 18:55:00 +0000

In reply to Jaimi@The Stay-at-Home-Mom Survival Guide.

Thanks for your comment Jaimi! Absolutely we are judging, to a degree, what others are doing so we can evaluate whether we think it might work for our kids, or if we’d feel comfortable doing that. It’s part of the reason I like reading parenting books! I like getting many different ideas, or parenting tools, at my disposable, and be able to pick and choose what will work best for my family and our situation. But, YES, we are absolutely self-judging ourselves way more than is healthy or good, as I alluded to in the post some. And I do think our opinions can be valuable to another mother!! Absolutely! It’s why I blog about things we’ve done along our parenting journey, in the hopes that maybe it will work for another family (or an adaptation of it at least). But, there is SUCH a difference on sharing your opinion and condemning another. I just had some nasty, name-calling, comments on one of my pin posts yesterday. And THAT is exactly the type of thing I don’t understand. It served no purpose to them, or to me.

And I try to speak truth, and God, and the understanding that we all are flawed, and that maybe we all just need more grace and understanding.

By: Jaimi@The Stay-at-Home-Mom Survival Guide

Jaimi@The Stay-at-Home-Mom Survival Guide — Mon, 23 Feb 2015 17:42:55 +0000

I see this a little differently, which of course means many will think I am judgmental. I think we are SO educated these days as moms and women in general compared to 50 years ago that we have been educated to think and analyze, so we do it naturally to our own choices and also others. (Because how do we ever actually develop our own parenting philosophy by any other means than looking at what others do and “judging” whether it can work for us?) The core problem, though, IMHO is that we are self-judging and then projecting on others. It is odd! We are SO overly concerned about “doing it right” that we are actually assuming that a strange look from another mom means she is criticizing our choice/parenting when in reality she may have just had something in her eye or needed to sneeze…seriously, though, we are WAY too concerned with our parenting choices being approved by others that we miss that the main focus of parenting should be God, and teaching His love to our children. As a Christian, I will try to share that God is the key in as non-judgmental of a way as I can, and having experience in early childhood education, daycare and teaching, I will also share what I learned from that…not as judgement of another mother, but as the possibility of it being useful-should another mother want to consider it. This is an important post, because there are plenty of moms who are not trying to do their best because motherhood is too overwhelming, and you have helped them by speaking truth that we are all flawed and learning and cheering each other on to raise successful children!

By: Katelyn Fagan

Katelyn Fagan — Fri, 30 Jan 2015 19:43:11 +0000

In reply to Sara Reimers. Thanks so much Sara! Absolutely. Each family will do what they feel is best and what works with their situation. So even if you don't agree with her parenting styles, it doesn't inherently make her a bad mom (or a good mom). Really, just a mom. And that's good.

By: Sara Reimers

Sara Reimers — Fri, 30 Jan 2015 03:48:28 +0000

Wow, I love this post. It is funny because my sister and I have probably polar opposite parenting styles… she is the slightly crunchy, thrifty, organic SAHM, homeschooling Mom. I am the professional, work outside the home, helicopter parent, over schedule/spend, slow cooker rocks, traditional Mom. Before kids, I know I was all judgey about her choices, but the second I became a Mom myself, I realized that she is doing what works for her and her family… and ultimately she is parenting the way she is because she loves her daughter fiercely. I know this because I make my parenting choices wholly out of love as well. So, yeah, loving this post!

By: Katelyn Fagan

Katelyn Fagan — Tue, 27 Jan 2015 19:04:46 +0000

In reply to Nina. I know I'm guilty of thinking some of these things too!! It's so silly. And I agree. I do think the vast majority of us are good moms, just doing it the best we can.

By: Nina

Nina — Tue, 27 Jan 2015 16:19:26 +0000

Well said, Katelyn. That video made me all teary-eyed when I saw it lol. I’ve never been called a bad mother but I’ve heard some comments where I’m pretty sure people thought that what I was doing was strange. And I catch myself doing the same to other moms, saying “I’d never do that” or “Oh man why are they doing that with their kid?” but then I say, “I’m pretty sure people are saying the same thing about me!”

I think most moms in this day and age are good moms, and they may just show it in different ways.